Sending a piece of my heart to Guatemala

Before I moved back to my hometown in Southern Illinois I heard about a fabulous concert in Elkhart, IN. Actually it started out as just fabulous and then it became a once-in-a-lifetime concert, for me anyway. It was the Promises tour with Sanctus Real AND JJ Heller. At first when I heard Sanctus Real was coming to town, I was like, yeah. That would be pretty cool. But when I knew they were accompanied by JJ Heller... forget it. I'm so there. I was not even deterred in the least to know that no one was available to go with me. I was going alone but this show was being played for ME. Hello.

I started listening to SR when I was in high school. The coolest hippest station, 102.1 The Alien played their song, Say it Loud. My best friend and I were always jamming to this one. Loved it! "30 hour drive through the Rocky Mountains..." She bought me their CD, "Fight the Tide." And my love for them continued. ***WHHHHAAA A bug just flew into my eye!

Okay, I'm back. Now, JJ Heller. I was introduced to them in college by my dear friend, Jenn. I was going through breaking up with my fiance in 2009. You know that feeling you get when you're going through a break up and its like you forgot what it felt like to feel normal? It hurts so bad that you forget what day it is. It was then when I first heard Your Hands. Such a beautiful song. It spoke to my simple Sunday school self. It reminded me of the simplest truth of my faith. God is here. I am His and He is mine. Thats it. God used that song to lead me to the other side.

  Did I tell you I love Sanctus Real? As I've grow up their music has changed to me. It means something. I'm sure if you listen to Christian music at all you've heard Whatever You're Doing. A.MA.ZING. I have heard so many stories of that song touching lives. Its good. That song defined my transformation from struggling post college grad to "thriving" grad student. Thriving is a relative term... ;) Seriously that song encompasses my thoughts, fears, hope from 2010-2012.

Well, I haven't even mentioned Guatemala yet! I'm getting there! One of the speakers for the concert was a child advocate for Compassion International. Now, I actually have a history with Compassion. Flashback: I was a simple-minded, well-meaning high school student at a CIY conference. I was moved to sponsor a child, from Peru actually. I am not sure if God was telling be to do it, but I felt compelled. Who wouldn't? The stories of those children are so touching. I wasn't able to keep up with the payments. I felt so guilty about it. And as a high school student, thats what they were, just payments for something I'd signed up for. I meant well, but I didn't get it.

Since graduating in 2010, I have been trying to figure myself out. What is God telling me? What am I doing? Where am I living? (Resident of 3 states in 3 years, people. This is serious.) After talking to a inspiring woman I met in my last church, I have accepted that I am God's vessel. I am empty for Him to fill and pour out. I am made to BE Christ to the world. God has given me the responsibility to care for his people in whatever way I am presented. This lifestyle is a challenge. Everyday is a challenge. I like my time. I like my money.  I am learning what real stewardship is. More than my tithe belongs to God.

I knew this time, God was telling me to use my money to sponsor a child. I prayed as I listened JJ Heller and later the announcement was made that anyone choosing to sponsor a child tonight would receive Sanctus Real's new CD and get to meet the band. If that is not a sign from God that that is exactly what I was suppose to do, then WHAT IS?!

With that in mind, I'd like to tell you about the newest member of my family. :) Her name is Sheila. She is 6 years old and she is from La Trinidad, Guatemala. It was so exciting to look through the packet I got after I signed up. Her father is a farmer and her mother is a stay at home mom. She has 5 siblings. I am so pumped to support this little girl, write to her, and love her.

 Just 2 days ago I got an email from Compassion saying that they'd told Sheila that she has a sponsor. It gave me goosebumps. I came to the dining room table to eat breakfast with my family after reading that email and I cried over my raisin brand. She knows about me. She knows that someone is going to take care of her. She is going to have opportunities that she couldn't have without me. ME. Wow. Such a big responsibility. God has blessed me so much, honestly its an honor to give my money to help someone else. Now when I go to work, I do my job knowing that someone is depending on me. I have a purpose, even as a grad-student Aldi cashier. God has filled me and "my cup overflows with blessings." Psalms 23:5

The last song of the concert was Whatever You're Doing. I was already crying as they played. I didn't know how the show could get any better until Matt, SR's lead singer, welcomed JJ Heller to the stage to sing the last chorus of their song. Here I watched as two of the most influential musicians in my life sang one of the most powerful songs I've ever heard. I closed my eyes and I was alone with my God.

Making the Insides Happy

Now, I am suppose to be doing my homework right now, but alas, my motivation is lost. I thought maybe I'd find it here. I have been on a weight loss journey for over a year now. I didn't have that much to lose, but I am finding it impossible to reach my goal. It's a mere 8 pounds away! Usually, I am not a fan of "dieting" but I just HAVE to kick this last 8 pounds. The book boasts that you can lose up to 20 pounds, 4 inches, and 2 sizes in 6 weeks. It's definitely worth a try, right? Now if I can stick to it... that's the question.

 I kinda have this tendency of doing whatever I want. Ha!  If I feel like eating a cookie and I'm watching what I eat, it doesn't matter, I eat a cookie. I don't let anything stop me. Sometimes if I am able to change the way I think about what I am eating, I can stop myself. It's like needless eating is worshiping the god in my stomach. She calls to me and I obey her. Then afterwards, I always regret it. I'm sure most of us can relate to this feeling. How can you shake this?

Even though I know God loves me and I should honor him with my body, it seems like what I eat is no concern of His. I don't think this is true. But living it is dang hard!

It's time to take a step forward: trusting God with my career path, my love life, and my physical body. Tomorrow is day 1 of shred diet. I'll be praying it through! Let's get healthy!

 

The first picture was taken in 2011, I weighed approximately 178 and in the second photo was taken just a few weeks ago and I weighed 158.

Livin' the Sister Life

I've been living with my sister, brother-in-law, and nieces for the past month. I came from living alone in Kentucky, to having people around all the time! I've got to learn to balance my schedule more! I am in grad school online through the University of Kentucky and having sweet little babies running around can be distracting sometimes. EEk.

One thing I have loved is having a friend around all the time. We shop together, make food together, work out together, and do silly things together. It's what I always wanted in Kentucky with a roommate! Too bad I couldn't still be there and with my sister too.

I miss you, Kentucky!

Harper Rae, looking cool in her shades!

Mis Maddy doing what she does best, being CUTE.

SHOPPING!

The loot from our Goodwill trip today!

Giveaway at Ruby Rae Handmade!

Hello everyone! My sister's new shop, Ruby Rae Handmade is having a giveaway! I hope you will enter! It's easy!

You'll win a Cozy Owl Pillow by The Sunshine Marigold (thats me!), a Yoyo Headband from Ruby Rae Handmade, and a T shirt basket crocheted by With Eager Hands.

To enter:
"Like" Ruby Rae Handmade on Facebook
"Like" the other participating artists The Sunshine Marigold and With Eager Hands
Invite your friends to "like" Ruby Rae Handmade

Each of these is an entry and for each friend you invite, you get an entry.

You must comment to Ruby Rae Handmade when you have completed an entry. The friends you invite must comment to tell who sent them so we know who gets credit for the entry!

Any questions? Comment to Ruby Rae Handmade on Facebook!

Thanks :)

Tra la la

Alas, I shall press on. Living without Internet is difficult for keeping up with blogging, yet I will not give up. There are some cool new happenings in Whitneyland. I am studying for the GRE in April. Eek. Its definitely a process. This leads to that, that leads to something, and somethings leads to everything. I hope.

I am thinking it is important to have special things to look forward to periodically, especially when you're out of school.When the holidays and breaks are gone working day in and out can get so daunting. I am fortunate enough to have friends close by and a family visit about once a month or so. And this summer I am looking forward to moving in with a dear friend of mine! My lease is up in July and I get to move to a new place. At first the moving and coping to a new apartment was stressful. I didn't feel like I had a home and I was sad a lot. But when you embrace it, it can be super fun. You get to change and be new! I get to see a new side of the city I love, I think its going to be nice to be away from the nuts of living so close to largest mall in the state. Hooray for new adventure!

Here's me getting ready for good times at ALDI.

Potential

I have always felt that I had lots of this, potential. But how do you turn your potential into being? I didn't plan any specific resolutions this year, except to live up to my potential. I want to try to excel at things I've tried and know I am good at. I want to be the person I imagine being. I concluded that my last relationship was full of potential. That's why it ended. Full of unmet potential, I was in love with what "could be." And now its gone. I am not content any longer to let my life be like that. No more longing for what I know I can be!
I can be an artist, I can be a blogger, I can volunteer, I can get my masters, I can be a missionary, I can be healthy.

I know that with God's help my talents can be used to accomplish these potentials. I call them potentials because, they are more than goals. These are already within me. The seed is already planted, its just a matter of blooming my potential into reality.

Now besides potential, I am also really good at excuses. I blame my living arrangements, my financial stability, my emotions, my work schedule. I know its nothing that cannot be easily overcome. Part of the joy of reaching potential is knowing how greatly you worked for it. I am blessed to be living in a fantastic city with free Internet everywhere and if achieving potential is something that matters to me, I'll drive to the Internet if that's what it takes to create a new blog post. Often I find myself dried up of the inspiration to craft. I tell myself, "If only you had a roommate to talk to you'd want to doing something other than watch T.V." Yet, as time goes by, I accomplish more and more by myself and it feels good! My crafting isn't about anyone but me and the One who has given these abilities. Anyway, this is about living up to MY potential, not my roommate's or my boyfriend's.

When I turn around and I look at myself I just have to smirk. In college, I never believed I could do anything alone. I needed my husband. I needed him to work for me. I needed him to protect me. I needed him to help me. I was waiting for God to present me with this man who would do these things for me. Instead he empowered me to do these things for myself. As I had been planning my life, so was He.

You will be hearing more from me. After-all, I'm potentially a brilliant blogger. :) 

Hello New Life!

Ah, It is nice to blog again. There is so much to share. I have moved! I am now back in good ole Kentucky! Farm life was fun for a short time and although I have no solid plans, I am here again in the Bluegrass State. I now live the life of an adventurer! No obligations to tie me down, no job to waste my time, its just me and Charger. We go on walks, runs, and play ball! Sometimes we sew together and watch movies. We like to stay up late and sleep in late. We are the King and Queen of our tiny one bedroom kingdom. Envious aren't you?

I am fervently searching for employment, but I might as we soak up the good times while I can, right? I am amazed at everything here, the gas prices, the dog park, and the proximity of everything to me. It unlike anything I've ever known, but that's coming from a small town farm girl. Although I have no idea what I am going to do here, besides school, I know this is the right place for me to do it!

Now, time for some PHOTOS!  

Dad saran wrapping the trailer with my things.

Ah, the joys of moving. I should say, the messes of moving.

Farmer's Market!

I hope to share much more excitement with you soon! Prayers for my job search are much appreciated!